In the next few days, I will sign for probably $15 million in equipment.  That’s not the scary part that I loose sleep over.  I have run budgets larger than that before.   What keeps my brain occupied, is the 39 soldiers that I signed for (not literally).  It can be nerve racking at times to be responsible for some of these young men.  Less than a year ago, some of them were running around with gangs and involved in drugs.  For several of them, joining the Army was a way out and a way to stability.  Today they can no longer have the free access to the things of the streets.  At times, the same immaturity and poor judgement remain.  Now, they have the responsibility of driving $600,000 vehicles and operating heavy machine guns in a country half way around the world.  Army doctrine states, as the Platoon Leader, I am responsible for everything my platoon does or fails to do.  When a good or poor decision is made by a member of my platoon, I might have as well done it myself.  Today I had to sit in a meeting to review a situation regarding our escalation of force.  A class III laser was used by our rear gunner to keep traffic from our convoy.  The vehicle in question, was a military vehicle that had approached from a different road.  From the darkness and dust, it was not identified properly.  What a battalion commander (Lieutenant Colonel) with multiple college degrees and a staff of senior officers had an hour to review, a 19 year old soldier had to decide in just a few seconds.  This is the responsibility we put on these young men.  They carry out the fragile policies of our commanders, and can take life away with the pull of a trigger.