What ’s happening in my office?

A Deep Longing

Wed, 3 Feb 2010 12:12:59 +1000

A while ago I discovered eleccam. Its a live feed camera from Thembe Nature Reserve in South Africa of a waterhole.

I have now incorporated it into my normal writing day. Bearing in mind South Africa is 8 hrs behind us so at 9.30 when I sit down to write, its still nighttime in South Africa and there is no use watching a black screen. But around lunch time, I start checking in, seeing who is visiting the waterhole for an early morning drink.... and just before i fetch the boys from school, I take a little peek to see who is there again for their 8am ...and sometimes I check again just before bed at 10pm - and then its 2pm at the water hole.. and creatures of all sizes are usually drinking their full. Not every day - but most I share with a zillion other people the wonders that are the animals of Thembe.

I’m not sure this was a good thing - or a bad one.

A good thing:
I have been restless lately, I’m editing not writing and I hate editing. I love writing the story, but when its done, I hate spending time on it making it better - my story is out my head - I want to move onto the next one. But to add to the restlessness, I am editing another book set in Africa.

There is an old saying that goes - you can take the person out of Africa, but you can’t take Africa out of their heart. I believe this is so.

Taking a look through my work - I have African themes in almost everything I do - and its expected - thats my upbringing, its where I took my first step and where I have buried family. Its also where I met and married my husband.

But its a place I chose to leave. So why am I longing for it now after 13 years living away. I don’t know...

Perhaps its pictures like this that make me want to return to the bush:

(Thank you Mark Webster from OUTBACK AFRICA SAFARIS" for the beautiful photos above.)

Or ones like this...

Thanks to my sister Dale who sent these on to me. After much debate in her household, and mine we decided this is a baby bush buck with this cat. But what ever it is, they look like firm friends. (Sorry I can’t credit the person who took these as it was just in an email.)

But I do know this, for every moment I spend looking at that elecam, I feel at home, and I know that even though I can’t live in Africa and be near these beautiful creatures of the wild, I love having them come to my desk. I might be out of Africa but I need Africa to help me with my writing.
This afternoon there was 2 wildebeest standing in the rain - and while there is no sound , it was still so good to see African animals roaming free on my screen...

A bad thing:
Elecam is one more way I have found to procrastinate and avoid writing. Worse than facebook as I don’t get bored of it. If I let it, elecam could consume many hours of my time, especially when there are large herds of majestic elephants and the odd rhino coming down to the water and drinking...kudu, impala, giraffe, zebra, baboons to name a few - I have seen a large variety all gather at this meeting place.

Finding a balance:
So I continually have to find a balance inside of me.
Africa vs Australia.

I still listen to my African music, I have started watching Alexander MaCall Smith’s #1 Ladies Detective Agency on our TV with my kids, and we are LOVING it! (A whole new library of artists opening up to me from that show to listen to...) And I continue to watch doco’s on Animal Planet on Africa and its wonderful people and animals.

I look outside and I see the dark side of the Australian moon at night, and feel the warm lash of rain as it arrives in squalls off the sea onto my home. I see the beautiful dolphins frolicking in the canal or just near the bus stop where my boys catch their school bus. I notice that yesterday morning there were 8 pelicans on the lights across the bridge and one osprey on the last pole pretending to be a pelican... and I listen to the croak of the magical green tree frog at night and know that I am safe and secure in my little house on the water, and although I miss Africa, Australia is now my home.

So where is all this coming from you ask? Well, finding your mojo has been a big topic with my writing friends lately.
Can you loose it ?
How do you get it back if lost?
What is your mojo and where is it?
Writing is a strange business. Some days you don’t want to be a writer because its all just too hard. But then inside you is this story burning to get out, and you sit down, and write it. You keep on trying to write the story. And hopefully there will be people out there who will tell you they have read your story - and cried and laughed with your charters, and they have loved it. Its like sharing a piece of yourself every single book you write.

Today as I was trying to support a friend as she reclaimed her mojo, I realised something....

My mojo lives inside me. It isn’t a place or a routine, it isn’t a series of events - rather its that precious soul of Africa that never leaves my heart. When I delve deep into that - then my writing comes alive and the characters in my head, become living breathing people on my screen.

One day I hope that you feel the same about my characters once you have read their stories, and you will love them too ...

Another Year...its 2010

Tue, 12 Jan 2010 13:18:18 +1000

Happy New Year everyone!

In January each year I rethink my writing goals. It was an idea that our one KidsDownunder
Yahoo writing group had, and when I joined them 4 years ago I started too. And it is amazing to
see the years tick by - and also what goals you set - and achieve, and also look at why the
others were not achieved...I think when you have has the same goal for three years and still
not achieved it - perhaps reassess that goal and change it. Its not working the way it was..

So in 2009 I achieved 9 out of 15 goals set. And as a writer I am celebrating the small things - so wohhhhhhhhhh!!!!!! 9 is great and 9 is better than zero.

Recently I have been reading a lot of blogs. I have a two crit partners who somehow manage to pass on the right blog entry to me at the right time ( Thank you Cathryn Brunet and Suzi Love for weeding out the best and always sharing!).

This morning Cath passed me this one from Adrienne Kress, a writer and actress. ( ididntchoosethis.blogspot.com )

This is a great blog post, and one worth reading. Basically to sum it up -
Adrienne says, that she is still in with more of a chance at getting her next book published,
because despite Kristin Nelson's stats - (15 books sold, 6 new clients, 38 000 queries and
only 55 full request) - appalling odds. The majority of submissions agents receive are
complete and utter crap. And since hers isn’t - it should get published.

And this got me thinking - I’m not worried about those stats either - mine isn’t crap!!!!!

But... What if it is?

I have a close writing friend who probably writes the equivalent of three books for every one she completes as she ditches most of what she has done along the way, whole chapters, three chapters at a time... its scary to watch - really! Is her writing along the way crap ? I don’t know - but at the end when she is finished her process - she produces a wonderful book, its done and dusted and she doesn’t spend time editing - its ready. Its just her way of doing things.

I vomit out the first draft, then spend hours upon hours fixing it up to submission quality. Is mine crap? I don’t think so - but then I tend to think I am a great writer because Jennifer Cruise told me I am allowed to, and I believe it!

Friends and family also send these wonderful emails,
some I ditch, as I won’t pass on a threat - its just rude!
But others like the saying and the photies in this bog
today come out of an email...I have no idea where or
who started it so I can’t thank them for the images or
that they made me smile. But sometimes its nice to
receive this type of junk mail in your inbox in the
morning....

My favourite would have to be this last one - not only because its beautiful - but because I just get it!

And may your friends always bring you joy!
Until next month - stay safe and out of trouble!

Bye 4 now
Tina

Happy Christmas & A Safe and Happy New Year

Thu, 24 Dec 2009 11:40:52 +1000

Christmas is tomorrow. Are you ready?

I think I am. But then one can never know... I have my mind made up for lunch, but if it rains
the menu will change.

Everyone who knows me well knows I love Christmas. My lights are up, the tree touches the roof
( and we have 9 foot ceilings) and trimmed. Yes the decorations are moved around each day -
a little here and there by both Shaun and I, but interesting to note this year, our boys started
doing it too...some behaviours are definitely inherited from watching your parents. It’s really sweet
to watch... the Micky Mouse now stands in his own silver box, and there are 4 reindeer pulling a sleigh. Jack (from Nightmare before Christmas) is in that sleigh with the presents in, where yesterday Jack was hanging near to Zero...mmm someone had moved things around again. Always interesting in our house!

This year we are just us at home, the basic family of four. So we are doing our variation of an Aussie Christmas. A no frills BBQ, with steak, boerewors (a South African sausage) and ribs. But I did make our christmas pudding early this morning so all traditions have not gone out the window. Of course the kids are excited for the presents under the tree, and are quite convinced they will get away with making chilli laden cookies for Santa this evening. Choc-chip cookie with chilli...mmm actually they might not be so bad...Happy Christmas Santa!

On the writing front its been busy. I have my blaze at its final reader (Thank you as always Mrs B) so she can take her red pen to it and correct my spellings...mmmm, hope this time I might surprise her and have caught all my mistakes for a change-

I’ll share some of ‘Tina’s famous mistakes during 2009’:
defiantly instead of definitely
Overuse of awesome, brilliant and ‘and then’
bear instead of bare
shit instead of shirt...
wanderful instead of wonderful ...and they continue to eternity.

Once it comes back it will be on its way to the Harlequin Toronto office by email - should be mid January - so I will keep you in the loop with that. Remembering this was requested as a full at the RWA Washington Conference earlier this year.

I have gone back to the drawing board with my Random House manuscript as it didn’t quite work as I had hoped changing it from a YA into a women’s fiction. Will start another draft after Christmas as the changes have been cooking on my head and are almost ready to write down again. Wish me luck.

Singita is also just waiting patiently for its final read until winging through to Mrs B...

So until we speak again, have a Merry Christmas, and stay safe!

Bye 4 now
Tina

Its a cats life!

Thu, 12 Nov 2009 13:24:40 +1000

This is Baggie - one of our family cats. I have previously bogged how he came into our lives when we didn’t need another cat - and yet he has brought so much joy to this family that we couldn’t have asked for a better stray to find us. Yesterday after I was finished on the tread mill he took it over like only a cat can and made it his own.

Recently we lost our oldest cat Fluffy. She was over 18 years old, so she had a great innings. This was her:

And the nine years we had her were mostly wonderful. Even in the very end she purred and showed us how much she loved us.

And this is Binx - and as you can see although he too was another stray, he has made himself more than at home in our house.

Basically cats rule in our house!

But they do so much more - they give us unconditional friendship, love and affection - as long as we feed them, and fuss them on their terms.

Much like writing a book...
1. As long as you feed it regularly - you actually write and keep writing it consistently.
1. You give it fusses when it needs it - you edit it and make it happier/better

Then it will give you love back - i.e. you will complete it - and you can share its love with the world.... make sense?

Probably not if you are not a writer - but it makes sense to me.

So.... this week I will continue to nurture my book.
I will continue to feed it - make it nice and healthy and probably a little fat ( the editor can always suggest where to trim the fat if necessary)
I will fuss it and make it read as the silkiest smoothest book it can
And hopefully it will purr into the ears of the acquiring editor and she will like it and respond to it positively.

My WIP is the final edit on my Blaze...and the cats in that book are only a little bigger than my ‘kitty-kats’ at home - they are cheetahs...

(Images from De Wildt breeding program and off Katrina’s Animal Blog )

How can you not love theses cats, as much as my hero loves them?

So back to my book now...it needs some of its own fussing!

Bye 4 now
Tina

Showing up for work

Fri, 6 Nov 2009 11:21:11 +1000

Once again I’m guilty of not looking after me and finding I woke up and I feel like a flat tyre. All the functionality is sucked out of me and I have no go left in me to give anymore.

It’s all gone.

Deflated. Nothing I can do can make it magically re inflate and work again. I’m tired.

It’s days like this that as a teenager you could get away with a day in bed, with a good book, ignoring the world around you...But as an adult and a mum with two active boys, its a no brainer.... it’s not going to happen. You have the school morning, the lunches to make, the before school tennis and the bus run to do...

So how do I go from this flat tyre, back to the face the world sees? The happy, full of energy and vitality sunflower?

Admittedly I know that I need to slow down and stop the late nights, get to bed at a reasonable hour ( not 2am...).

Just this week I got back on the treadmill again and started cutting back on the junk food (again!) I lit candles around the house that smell nice. I would take a trip out in the boat - feel the fresh air in my hair - the warm sun on the face, if it wasn’t storming and threatening wild weather!

And then I realise - I have forgotten to enjoy life’s little pleasures again in my rush and hurry time...

But this flat-soul, it needs something else sometimes... those times when chocolate just doesn’t cut it ?

So... what do you do when you get into a funk-mood? How do you put air back in your tyres and get ready to race again?

September and October were exceptionally busy months in my life. With the CYA Conference in September, then wrap up of that, getting the feedback sheets back to entrants, doing the invoicing etc - it made me think more about how much more I can automate the process in my life, get things moving faster so that I could spend more time doing the things I love.

I have the robot vacuum - yes.

I have a robot mop - yes.

In 2009 I automated a lot of the CYA forms making data capture easier - yes. ( but will endeavour to do more in 2010.)

I have a dishwasher, a bi-weekly cleaner and a creepy-crawly in the pool...

I should have time to write - Yes?
So where does it all go??? This supposed time of mine - because I don’t get ten hours or so to write in a day... so I compiled a list:
1. Facebook - its a time waister. But its a great tool for staying in touch with people...we need to make more time in our lives for friends and family and if its just a sentence a day - its better than nothing. Facebook stays.
1. Emails - they vacuum up time like they have no limit on how much they can take either - their bag is never full. - But they have become a necessary part of life - I fight a paper war in my office as it is - imagine if all that correspondence turned back into paper... how many trees would have to die then? Email stays.
2. Walking backwards and forwards to the fridge to nibble. MMMM this need needs to go.
3. Daydreaming. This one stays - its a necessary part of my thought process for my books.

So.. other than trips to the fridge - I really can’t find more time in my day.

I figure this is where I need that lecture - you know the one that says:

Cut yourself some slack...which means that I need to kinder to me - and just let my process take as long as it takes.
Don’t try hurry it along - because I only get upset about it - and land up doing nothing, instead of fretting when I need to do other stuff in life..
I will take time out to enjoy it instead.

So I went out into my garden today and looked around without a critical eye at the odd weed... and this is what I saw:-

A beautiful tropical garden.

So what if roses don’t like my sea sand - I have day lilies, and palms, cycads and frangipanis that are just recovering their leaves, which mean flowers are not far behind...geraniums and chillies in abundance, agapanthas and petunias. The yesterday-today-and-tomorrows and gardenias smell heavenly. Green and colour splash over my yard like a painters canvas that someone threw paint over in a modern spectacle of colour.

I looked out of the canal and past our boats - and this is my view:-

A sea that sparkled as if someone had sprinkled diamonds on the surface, and a stingray jumped and splashed down, as if to remind me, you need to be out here to witness the beauty of nature.

And I was reluctant to return inside and write, because it was all so nice outside.

So I didn’t. I walked around listening to the buzz of the bees, and the birds calling from the avery, and the wild parrots screech as they flew overhead. The magpies chortling ... I came inside and sat down and began to laugh at a Graham Norton show... then I was reminded that I had missed the school bus. . .

My kids were sitting on the side of the road - patiently waiting for their mum to show..sitting on some strangers wall, swinging their legs, hopefully not fighting as kids do when they are at odds with their upset routine.

My mum persona flashed back into focus so fast as I raced out the door...stuff funk - that’s a privilege for teenagers.
My mum persona showed up for work in full force. The protective cougar nurturing her cubs!

So Tina the mum is back, a little tired, but no longer feeling sorry for me - my funk is gone.

Its like that with writing too, you don’t get too choose when you can be in a funk and when not. You just have to show up to work, put you butt in the chair and write, doesn’t matter about the funk because like those ‘real’ kids, the book must get nurtured, written, and finished.

And talking finished... my book with the edits for Random House is completed its rewrite and is with my lovely critique partners now.

On to the edit for my Blaze due in at Harlequin now...

Thanks for chatting.

Bye 4 now
Tina