look into my eyes

training

Fri, 4 Dec 2009 07:35:36 -0500

Well, I finally received a note from one of my 7 readers. He said he wanted to hear more about training, racing, and gossip and that his thoughts on my last entry could be summed up in the bumper sticker “Cavemen created religion to explain fire.”

I like that, it’s funny. Sure, either the reader or the author of that bumper sticker aren’t sophisticated enough to distinguish between God (or any other name for Creator) and religion but I think that’s part of the problem today. People can’t distinguish between the two because there’s so much apathy about organized religion that God has been thrown out with the bath water.

What I can’t believe is that he wants to hear about training but here goes: I had a great session with ProTour rider Dom Rollin the other day. Of course, the only reason I’m mentioning this isn’t because I think it’s interesting (or that I care my readers may think it’s interesting) only to drive-by gloat that I get to train with guys who ride the Vuelte Espana and Amstel Gold and the Tour of California. Back to the “training.” 7 hill repeats at race pace up Shawmont here in Philly which is about 8/10 of a mile. Wattage was 475, 474, 389, 415, 404, 396, and 386. The ProTour rider was about 520-530 and hadn’t been riding in the previous 2 weeks so he was “out of shape.” Terrific.

Now, let’s talk about Tiger Woods. Woops! When Florida cops asked his wife how many times she hit Tiger in the face with the golf club she replied “put me down for a six.” I heard someone say that “Tiger made a mistake but I don’t believe he is a morally inferior human being.” Ladies and Gentleman, the end is near. Several women in many cities while his wife is at home bearing his children, and he’s not morally inferior? One reason he cheated was because he didn’t believe the consequences were severe, and that brings the discussion back to God. In his lifetime he’s probably right, the consequences for cheating aren’t severe. Forget about right and wrong, he didn’t believe he would get caught or he didn’t care. But there will be reckoning and he will have to answer for what he did. Some things are true whether you believe them or not.

What bothers me is that we have devolved into a society where people don’t consider an adulterer as a morally inferior human being. I really think we need a flood, a do-over if you will. In Philadelphia a man was dying in the Emergency Room and 3 people robbed him. He sat in the Emergency Room for 11 minutes before dying, and another 50 minutes before being noticed by emergency personnel and instead of trying to get help, 3 people robbed him. I just don’t get it.

Oops, I forgot to add gossip! I heard Reese Witherspoon and Jake Gyllenhaal broke up. I think she saw this picture and decided she didn’t want to settle. Sorry Reese, I’m taken. But if you or your chin are looking for companionship, one of my readers (MVA) is single and ready to mingle.

jesus freak(Y) thursday!

Thu, 19 Nov 2009 08:28:15 -0500

Jesus Freak(y) Friday has such a better ring to it, but these blogs are written when they’re written and if I put it off another day just to satisfy the proper use of the Wheel of Fortune “Before and After” template, there’s no guarantee I would actually write it. You know what word always throws me for a loop when writing it? Guarantee. It’s just one of those words.

On another forum, someone asked “where do you see evidence of the existence of God?” This is a difficult question because every answer is open to fierce debate where not only is the answer itself under question but the person answering as well. I don’t like to debate beliefs in the context of faith because there is no traditional “proof” that someone is right so how can I argue that they’re wrong? I can only believe what I believe and thank them for sharing. Many answers are illuminating, especially for me as I am someone who questions his own faith every day.

My own response was:

I don't believe that all of "this" was just some sort of fluke. But I am also at a point in my life where slowbern was in his early 30's (though thank God not a Lions fan). After being diagnosed with Lymphoma 5 years ago, the post-survivor remorse has settled in. I am constantly questioning my faith and wonder if my belief is just a self-serving hope that there is more to this than just "this." That counter-argument, that God serves as a crutch, is common and I know that for my own personal fulfillment I will need to bridge the gap between hope and faith.

I've tried not to be influenced by other religions, denominations, or Catholicism (under which I was raised). Like many younger people who do believe in God, I have approached my faith having lost it at some point earlier in my life, and I've tried to be influence by what I see around me and not by what others believe. A lot of what I believe contradicts many of the foundations of Christianity and I won't get into that here but I believe that God isn't concerned about some of these details. But it's also left me feeling alone in my faith, like a man without a country.

With that being said, one book that has acted as a guide for me is C.S Lewis' "Mere Christianity." One point he makes that I will paraphrase is that you can see the existence of God in the inherent good of man and the moral law. Where does this desire to do good come from? He argues that like natural law it was not created by humans but unlike natural law, it can be broken. But moral human beings know when it is broken and even atheists know "right from wrong" and this comes from God. I know I personally have a long way to go but I also believe that I am on the right path.

Take a moment, all 7 of you, to try and answer that question. And as you do, consider a broader question of “How does this belief impact everything I am and everything I do?” Faith is personal but if you care to answer in the comment section and put words to thoughts I would enjoy it. I love hearing other viewpoints on this subject and I know this subject is difficult and maybe overwhelming but give it a shot! Some of the other responses I have enjoyed:

There are a couple of books out there on this topic. One book that I found particularly helpful was called Losing Your Religion; Finding Your Faith. It helped me to come to grips with some of the stuff that I had problems with in Catholicism,

2 interesting people that I have heard some interviews on this topic are Anne Rice and Peggy Noonan. Both of these women were born and raised Catholic, became atheist, and then found their Faith back in Catholicism in their middle ages. Their spiritual journeys are interesting in me. Anne Rice actually has written about this in the appendix of her novel Christ the Lord, Out of Egypt. Peggy Noonan writes a little of her journey in a book called John Paul the Great.

For my part, I was born and raised Catholic. Like many people, I lost my faith in my 20's. It is hard to explain how this happened, and I'm not sure I can articulate it. I read some of what others write here and it sounds kind of familiar. I was looking at science and the history of the Church and asking myself, how could there be a God? Also the other religions...what made mine right and their's wrong? Plus, there was so much disillusionment in my life. My wife was diagnosed with cancer, things were tough at work, I was witness to a lot of suffering. The concept of God didn't make sense to me for a period of time.

A few years ago (in my early 30's) I went through a period where I was depressed. It was a hard time. I didn't really know where to turn. It was affecting all aspects of my life.

I guess I can say that God found me. It was very helpful for me in my recovery to know that He was with me. My religion is mine. I think I am pretty tolerant of other people's faiths (and even their lack of faith). I really don't try to convert people except by being an example. I don't preach to people.

I know there are still many questions about how God relates to the universe. The conversation interests me but does not shake my faith anymore. My faith and relationship with God is in me and that is what I can understand (as much as I can).

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Nature, the amazing design and beauty of it all. Who could design something so complex?
The human body, the birth of my kids.
Sex, who would think to make it so good you would want to do it all the time and thus populate the planet.
Answered prayer. sure it could be a random chance thing but at times it's so specific that it takes you aback.
Medical miracles -an example is my brother who was cured of stage 4 lymphoma with only one round of chemo. according to the doc-no medical basis for his recovery.
People healed of all sorts of emotional disorders, drugs, abusive relationships
Hearts changed, healing of hurting people.
The way God reaches out to me where I am, through business, family, relationships. Not where I always think it should be.
The power of a group coming together for a common goal to help someone.

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The miracle of life and the complexity of the human body.

The amazing intricacies of nature.

The sudden appearance of "signs" when they are needed most.

The beauty of a woman's form.

The fact that there simply is no possible way that all of "this" simply "happened" by "accident" or "circumstance."

The fact that I walked away after being hit by a car traveling in excess of 65 mph while I was riding my bike. The state trooper, the local police officer, the ER doc, and my own doc all said (1) I should be dead and (2) there is no logical explanation as to why I was not seriously injured.

I believe in evolution, but that a higher power was behind it. I believe in the big bang theory, but that a higher power caused it. I believe in an afterlife. I believe in karma. I believe in spirits. I believe those who have passed continue to look after us.

I simply have seen way, way too much in my life that cannot be explained without the existance of a higher power.

I am a man of science. I am an engineer by education, attorney by profession, and possibly Vulcan by birth (but we are not sure about that yet). I demand proof for everything. Everything. I base my life on logic and facts. Everything must be explained. With that background, the only logically explanation for many of the issues listed above is a higher power.

Grayson James Turley

Tue, 10 Nov 2009 18:35:01 -0500

Do you ever look at other children and think “damn, that kid is ugly!”? Well, this is Monkey Encounter, not “Ugly kid whose parents think is cute and makes you question your own judgement of your own kid and wonder ‘maybe I’m just like that kid’s parents and I think my kid is cute but in reality he’s the Bat Boy” Encounter. I promise you, all kid’s are cute (except for the ugly ones) and my nephew, Grayson James Turley, is one cute monkey. For fun, google Bat Boy. I assure you, he lives.

You know the E*Trade kid--the kid that is probably a set of triplets and requires 28 takes, 4 hours of filming, and Computer Generated Imagery to create what my nephew was able to create in one take using a video camera and some Lemon Sorbet? Yeah. I’m not biased. He’s my nephew, not my son, and if he was ugly I’d keep him to myself. Take a look at that video, I dare you not to laugh. And if you don’t laugh, never visit this blog again. Seriously.

world series

Mon, 2 Nov 2009 07:23:01 -0500

Do you play the “don’t pass” line in craps? Are you a supporter of meter maids? And the Devil? Then you’re probably a Yankees fan. Look, I’m not saying Yankees fans aren’t justified in their jubilation over the soon to be coronation of their beloved Yankees, all I’m saying is that they have no soul. No offense. I understand you root for the logo on the front of the jersey, but it’s hard to ignore the name on the back.

A-Rod? This is a guy who injected anabolic steroids into his ass and then injected a women’s fertility drug to stimulate testosterone growth. You know why? Because when you take steroids, your balls stop producing man-juice on their own and they shrink. He then lied about it, started cheating on his wife with strippers, and finally admitted to the reason he had man-boobs was because he took steroids. But only while in Texas. Then he just decided to stop. A guy with not one, but two, TWO! pictures of himself as a Centaur decided he would just stop taking steroids because winning MVP’s and signing $300 million contracts wasn’t an incentive.

And when he admitted it, Jonny Damon, or as I like to call him-”the Dumbest athlete in the history of Professional Sports,” or “The DAHPS” told reporters that there are a lot of things worse than taking steroids and when asked “like what?” replied “Murder.” Thanks Jonny. Jonny’s the type of athlete who if asked what he’d be if not a professional baseball player would say something like “Astronaut” or “Fireman” or “Ninja.”

AJ Burnett signed with New York for $90 million after CC Sabathia signed because he didn’t want the pressure of being a number 1 starter. And if you combine the contract totals for CC, Mark Teixeira, and AJ Burnett-you get a number that’s higher than the total worth of 13 Major League teams! So Yankees fans, how are you feeling about this team? Is this your favorite team, just ahead of the South Bend Central Bears, 1980 Soviet Hockey Team, the Philistine Giants, and the IRS? Terrific, terrific.

Am I bitter? Of course! Here’s another picture of my nephew and me, he’s making my favorite face-the bitter beer face.

The berger/o’neill wedding

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 12:49:15 -0400

So, I’ve decided to resurrect my blog. My big, beautiful, hairy blog. And where better to start than the wedding of Evan Berger and Lorraine O’Neill?

A good friend of mine for a long time, the fact that I was a member of Evan’s bachelor party is another testament to how far I’ve come since college when I was...quite frankly, a prick. Evan didn’t really like me (not many people did) but he tolerated me and once I realized that sucking sucked and I got my act together, Evan was there to embrace the change. Like my good friend Will Cason, another person who was there when I turned things around. Segueing nicely into Monkey Encounter, since it was Will always hounding me “when are you bringing Monkey Encounter back, when are you bringing Monkey Encounter back?” here we are once again. Is having a blog for 7 people to read worth the ridicule from the 8 or 9 people who pretend not to read and think blogs are self-serving and a waste of time? I guess I’ll vote ‘yes’ for now. And since I strung you all along only to abandon you when you needed me the most, I promise I won’t pull a disappearing act on you again. Here is a photo of Will, the groom, and my sister with her husband:

Yes, the “hello world, I’m a tan, good-looking Mexican” look is patented Will Cason. I’d hate to shoot out of the gates too quickly for my first return to the blogosphere so I’ll end with a “Let’s Go Phillies” and I promise you will hear from me soon. Too soon.