3rd Annie-versary

Sat, 10 Oct 2009 20:54:48 -0400

I “celebrated” my 3rd annie-versary of my rupture last Monday. It’s been a rough month with putting Kim to rest so close to my own anniversary of my rupture and things being very stressful at work. I think Dave and I just need some time away from everyone and everything.

BUT, I have to continue to remember what I’ve been through and how lucky I truly am. Also how lucky I am to have Dave with me.

Even though it has been three years, there are so many things about that time period that remain so fresh in my mind. Some good, some bad and even after three years, there are still things that effect my head. I still get very tired. I still have head pain when I cough hard or sneeze hard. My eyes still have trouble in stores that have a lot of enclosed, small aisles with tons of items in them.

One interesting “side effect” I noticed is that I sleep more soundly. I was always a VERY light sleeper prior to the rupture. Now, once I’m asleep...I’m out! The furnace doesn’t wake me up when it pops on. Only the cats seem to wake me when I don’t want to be awakened...as the did that cool October morning in 2006 shortly before the rupture.

I’ve had trouble dealing with Kim’s death over my survival of my rupture. The questions “Why her and not me” is a question that won’t ever be answered. And I supposed I have to be okay with that. It’s a struggle sometimes.

It’s been a tough year for Dave and I, but I look forward to making more plans for our wedding in June. Something we’re looking forward to with great anticipation.

The K.A.T.-Walk

Thu, 17 Sep 2009 21:27:57 -0400

It was a stunning day out and a stunning location along the Back Cove of Portland, where Kim spent a lot of time walking. Dave and I got there very early for set up. Several tents, flags, signs and tables needed to be assembled. One tent for Dress For Success, one tent for Registration, one tent for the water and cheese that was donated, one tent for The Brain Aneurysm Foundation and a banner/tent that Dave made for our Starting Line. Then we had to post the many, many sneaker signs that Dave made. Among other things. Everyone was very impressed.

Almost 200 people showed up for the walk. Many others stopped to make a donation, but didn't attend the walk. I'd have to say what we lacked in quantity for the walk, we made up for with quality. Salt-of-the earth people with compassion and caring in their hearts. Kim was definitely looking down on us. Approx. $2,500 was donated just today and there is more online and in the mail that we're aware of. I’m now hearing well over $5,000 has been raised so far.

Kim's dog, her pug Bella, lead the walk. Dave informed me after a few steps that he wasn't participating with the walk, so I continued on by myself. Nancy couldn't do the walk either because of her hip surgery last summer. So I plugged on and met up with one of Kim's dear friends, Angel and she had a bad ankle, so we kept a slower pace, but made the entire 3+ mile walk and crossed the finish line in a little over an hour very sore, but proud of ourselves. I'm sure a lot of people in that city walk, bike or run that trail on a daily basis, but I don't, so I was beat.

Everyone helped tear things down, which was a HUGE help, then there was a small reception over at a pub/restaurant at a golf course that Nancy always goes out to. Everyone agreed it was a good day and everyone agreed Kim would have been very pleased.

The woman, Ginny, from the Brain Aneurysm Foundation brought some great things to hand out and raise awareness for the symptoms of aneurysms and the kinds of treatments. Magnets, fliers, brochures, key chains, pens and even DVDs. We were VERY pleased to see many people stopping at the booth and speaking with her. I had a short chat with her about my own experience with my annie and Dori and Rhonda, she agreed with me that you two should be check out given our family history with Debbie, Tim's and my aneurysm. Of course, I now worry about Dave and Nancy too!

I took my camera, but never pulled it out. There were many people taking photos and the sister-in law of one of the planners is a professional photographer and donated her time and services to take photos the entire day. I can't wait to see her photos. I think she'll have some really great shots.

We're both exhausted, but it was worth it. I ate two brownies with a tall glass of milk when I got home and had an Ibuprofen chaser and a long soak in the tub.

I think Kim was looking down on us and smiling and telling God “See those signs? My Uncle Dave made those.”. It felt good to DO good in her honor.

We Walk For Kim

Sat, 12 Sep 2009 18:25:53 -0400

Tomorrow we walk for Kim and to make people aware of brain aneurysms, their symptoms, the procedures to fix them and the many lives that are affected. It will be a bittersweet day, especially as the 3-year annie-versary of my own ruptured brain aneurysm approached in a few weeks.

Click here for more information and to see what a special person Kim was.

2009 Walk For Thought

Sat, 21 Mar 2009 12:15:40 -0400

We're home from the 2009 Walk For Thought for the Brain Injury Association of Maine. It was on a much smaller scale than last year, but with the same passion and drive of the volunteers and participants.

The event was at a Junior High School gym. Much smaller than the large indoor track we had the college last year, so it was boring scenery that came by much quicker! LOL It was 22 laps around the gym to roughly equal a mile. We only got to 2 1/2 miles. It was a tough walk with people in a smaller space and having to be careful of folks in wheel chairs, one blind person with a helper and a few baby strollers being pushed. It was very cold outside and they didn't designate an outdoor route, so it was all indoors.

But, as it was last year, it was very well organized with a lot of care and attention. I donated the t-shirt I was given, back to the BIAME to help fund the costs of the events. I raised a total of $753 dollars this year. Almost half of what I raised last year, but with the current economy, I was shocked I reached my initial $500 goal.

Obviously, Dave and I had Kim on our minds and in our hearts today and I was thinking about Jennifer a great deal as well. When we signed the "Wall Of Fame" poster, we signed it "in loving memory of Kim & Jennifer."

It was a pretty short event as well. We started the walk at 9:30 and by 10:30, lunch had been delivered and the crowd started to thin out. When we reach 2 1/2 miles, tables and chairs were being put away and things were being taken off the wall. I think we would have walked a little bit more, but we felt the pressure of stopping! LOL

There was one man there by himself. I saw him walk in and sit at a table behind us for breakfast. He had a photograph with him and kept taking it out and staring at it. Obviously, he was walking there today with someone in mind as well. There was another man who we saw last year. He's in a wheelchair, but used a walker to make several laps last year. He was doing a lot better this year with the walker and had a lot more speed. I commented to one of the women who was with him that he was doing better, but she said he was having difficulty looking at the floor. I agreed that was an issue...I kind of realized after awhile that it was bothering me too. There was a small pattern to the glossy wood floor.

Instead of the live band this year, they had a D.J. playing some tunes. It was fun and helped pass the time once Dave and I started to wind down. I'm hoping the other walks in the area have bigger turn outs and get more money. They said there were 50 walkers registered today, so that's down from last year.

We're both a little sore and quite tired, but I'm glad we did it again and will no doubt participate next year as well.

Brain Injuries

Sat, 21 Mar 2009 12:13:45 -0400

What a sad story about Natasha Richardson. Yet again, we're shown how fragile life is and how quickly it can be changed or taken away. My prayers go out to her family and children.

This is one of the things about post-annie that I've always been worried about...that accidental fall that could damage the coiling. I know that often times when I've almost stumbled over the cat, or lost my balance and caught myself suddenly, I still feel it where my annie is. Even after two and a half years. I was in a minor car accident last November and I have had the thought about what if it had been more severe...would I sustain more of an injury than a normal person due to my annie if it had been more serious? Hopefully, I'll never find out.

Movie Review: Life.Support.Music.

Mon, 2 Feb 2009 09:51:31 -0500

My Google alerts for Brain Aneurysms just popped up this review of a movie any annie sufferer or survivor should probably see. Click the link below to view the movie review.

Life.Support.Music.

Smoking and Annies

Sat, 17 Jan 2009 08:55:10 -0500

This is an interesting article pertaining to aneurysms and smoking.

Smoking, Family History Increase Risk of Stroke
By Rose Hoban
Durham, North Carolina
16 January 2009

Every day people are stricken by stroke. There are two kinds of this brain injury: The first occurs when a blood clot blocks blood flow to the brain, denying oxygen to the brain cells. The other kind of stroke occurs when a person has a hemorrhage in the brain or the surrounding structures. Hemorrhagic strokes are devastating. Forty percent of people who experience one will die. Most surviving patients are left with significant disability.  

Most hemorrhagic strokes are caused by aneurysms
Daniel Woo, a researcher at the University of Cincinnati, says most of these hemorrhagic strokes are caused by aneurysms. Woo explains an aneurysm is caused by a weakness in the wall of an artery. Under pressure, those aneurysms can expand like balloons, stretching the arterial wall.   "And if that enlarges badly enough, it can also burst and cause a hemorrhage," Woo says.   Now Woo has done research that looks at the relationship between hemorrhagic strokes and smoking. He says researchers have known smoking is a risk factor for aneurysm formation.   "We also know that having a family member who had a history of aneurysm rupture was also a risk factor for aneurysm formation," Woo says.   Woo looked at several hundred people who had had ruptured aneurysms and compared them to people who did not have aneurysms. He found that people who smoked had double the risk for aneurysm. His analysis also found that those with a family history of aneurysm also had twice the risk of forming one. But people who had the family history and who smoked were six times more likely to have a hemorrhagic stroke. He says that means hundreds of thousands, if not millions of people are at much greater risk of having a hemorrhagic stroke due to a combination of genes and behavior.  "Twenty percent of the population [in the U.S.] smokes, and 1 percent of the population has an aneurysm in their head that they just don't know about," Woo says. "So the rates can be fairly high of people having this, but so we're still talking about maybe 1 percent of the population, maybe one in 100 people."   Woo says it doesn't sound large, but he maintains it's still a significant percentage of the population.   Woo says that studies have indicated that aneurysms form gradually over time. He proposes that something about smoking causes them to form more readily.   Woo says one message from this research is clear: Quitting smoking almost immediately reduces the risk of rupturing an aneurysm.   His research is published in Neurology, the journal of the American Academy of Neurology.