billy jean is not my lover

Wed, 1 Jul 2009 19:08:33 -0700

(With apologies to my Michael Jackson friends…)

Wow, it’s been a really tough week for the entertainment industry…

Ed McMahon
Karl Malden
Billy Mays
Farrah Fawcett
Michael Jackson

Death: 5 Celebrities: 0

The one thing we all share in common, including celebrities and superstars, is death.
I hear it happens to the best of us.
I’ve only heard of one guy ever beating it, but that’s another story.

I purposely waited to say anything about the death of Michael Jackson for a week. I thought I would let the hysterics calm down a bit. Honestly, a week after his death, I’m glad to see the media circus taper off a bit. But I’m sure with the memorial coming up and the viewing at Neverland Ranch, things are sure to get whipped up into a fury again. The news media is so strange in America, like sharks smelling blood in the water. It really becomes like a feeding frenzy.

The only time I really see much TV is in the gym in the morning, on a treadmill or elliptical staring mindlessly at the screen in front of me as I slowly enter back into the land of the living. I have my headset on listening to music so I can’t really fully experience the joy of early morning network news. But with closed captioning and the all those info screens, I get way more than I really want.

And so this past week, I’m like, “Ok, enough already! I’m overdosing on media clips of Michael Jackson dangling his baby out the window, or dancing on top of that car with a bullhorn, or him dressed in sequins thrusting his pelvis across the stage, or him coming to court in his pjs!
Please, no mas!”

Honestly, I just don’t get it. Maybe it’s just me. I think we live in this strange culture that lifts people up into god-like status so we can worship them, and then we pick them apart or shoot them out of the sky so we can feel better about ourselves. Then, when they die, we immortalize them and talk about how much we loved them. I believe much of what we see going on in the celebrity world regarding the death of Michael Jackson is just more of the same game, not too different than the walk on the red carpet at Academy Awards. Where there is media, you’ll always find people all too eager to be in the spotlight to talk about how much the poor deceased really meant to them. “Is the camera on?”

The bottom line for me is that Michael Jackson was a person just like you and me. Well…maybe a bit more eccentric or weird. But maybe not. He leaves behind people, especially family, that will greatly miss him. Like us, he had his own personal demons to wrestle with and it sounds like there were a lot of them. He was in deep debt because of his lifestyle, spending $30 million more a year than he was taking in. (And I feel bad about using the ATM once in a blue moon!)

Truly, I shake my head and wonder why we idolize people like this in our culture. It remains a mystery to me.

Words from Psalm 49 come to mind –

• that putting our trust in wealth also puts us on shaky ground
• that no one has enough money to pay a ransom to save them from death
• that neither star power or money have what it takes to make us live forever
• that everyone, the well known and the unknown, all leave their wealth behind
• that success in this life vs. the one to come is measured in far different ways

And the really, really good news…

God is more than able to take ordinary lives like yours and mine and redeem us from the power of the grave.

In a nutshell -

Jesus: 1 Death: 0

Grace.

include me in

Thu, 25 Jun 2009 12:20:16 -0700

( I have really enjoyed reading “Tangible Kingdom” the past couple of weeks and it has helped to stir my thoughts about what I am writing.)

From a very young age, most of us as Americans have been well trained in the fine art of classic suburbia. That could also be described in another way as ‘anti-community.’ Unless of course you think deep and authentic community is knowing a few other parents by name on your kid’s soccer team

The way neighborhoods have been built for pretty much the past fifty years or so says it all. A detached home with a separate driveway and a garage with an opener so we can safely make it into our home without ever having to acknowledge any of our neighbors. Our backyards are nicely fenced exactly six feet high, here in Vegas with solid block walls so no one can even think about trespassing into our little fortress. The view is just high enough to see the top of our neighbor’s head with ever having to make eye contact!

When you think about it, it’s very different from the early church Jesus established. Uh…very different. Back then, it wasn’t just about a ‘personal relationship with Jesus.’ Instead, it was much more about being a part of God’s people. Everything it seems was done in the context of community. Coming to God meant becoming a part of God’s community. If you wanted a relationship with God, then you had to have a relationship with his people.

By contrast, much of church life in America these past few decades has looked eerily similar to our suburban lifestyle – go figure! We as ‘born-againers’ are by and large exclusive in our approach to people we reach out to, if we do at all. We pick people like us. People who think like us, dress like us, smell like us, vote like us. People who live like us righteous suburbanites! By and large, we have as churches created exclusive communities. We’re careful to keep the right people in and the wrong kind of people out.

And then we hang a banner on our church building and say, “Find community here.”
Wow, now that’s impressive. And we wonder why our culture isn’t beating a path to our church doors like a $1 flip-flop sale at Old Navy?

So what are we trying to create in our new community called the Village?
Well, instead of something exclusive, how about just the opposite? How about something way more looking like inclusive? Isn’t that what a true Christian community should be all about? Including everyone? If we really want to see God move in the world we live in, then we’re going to have to open up our church and welcome people who aren’t like us. I’m not talking about a location or a building. I’m talking about us as the people of God. People, who learn to reach out, include and love people into our faith community. It means creating a place where people can discover who God is, where they can see truth before they even hear about it.

And truthfully, this can get a bit messy at times, because it means welcoming people with alternative values and lifestyles. This calls for investing our time and patience with them but honestly, I already see it happening. I see people in the Village opening up their lives to people who aren’t at all like them and it has been amazing to watch. A couple of weeks ago on LifeGroup Sunday, I got to bring about a half a dozen people from the Village to the apartment of one of refugee families we met from Bhutan. And we had a great time putting together a dining room table for them that someone had generously donated. We assembled it in their little living room with no air conditioning and then they fed us a great meal of rice and curry vegetables. I can’t wait to go back because our new friends are so kind and hospitable. It truly was the highlight of my day.

I see others in the Village doing similar things. Opening up their lives and homes to refugees, homeless teenagers, the broken, the needy, the outcast. And I see God blessing what we are doing. I see people hanging around us because we are making them feel included. It makes me stop and think that I like what the Village is becoming and no one even planned it this way.
And I like that a lot.

Grace.

the fallen

Thu, 18 Jun 2009 14:03:41 -0700

I consider John Ensign a friend.

He has spoken at our men’s breakfast before and I know he has heard me speak as well over the years. We see each other occasionally at different events and the conversation is always good. That’s why the recent national news of his affair has been difficult to take. It’s the last thing you want to see for anyone, but especially for those under the scrutiny of the harsh lights of the American media. Whenever you are a politician or a pastor, the judgment is often brutally swift and harsh.

While I am in no way excusing John from what happened, (and he is paying the price right now) it’s just incredibly difficult to deal with anything like this when your private life is on display for all to see. Some might argue that it comes with the territory when you are in the public eye, and that point is well taken. However, it still doesn’t make it any easier for everyone to see your dirty laundry. I know enough from my own limited experiences I have gone through that you wish it on no one.

In one of the news stories, John is quoted as saying, “It’s the worst thing I have ever done.” Ironically, I was just talking to a couple of guys about this very thing the past week. We were somehow on the subject of sexual temptation and I made the comment that I have never heard a man say after committing adultery when all the dust has settled, “Wow, now that was great experience!” ,

Seriously.

What I hear from the guys I know who have strayed in their marriages is how painful and damaging the end result is. I have an old friend from high school who committed adultery after about 20 years in a committed marriage. When he was considering it, the advice he got from one of our other friends from school was some of the dumbest ever given on planet earth. The person, who has been single all their adult life, told him that if he didn’t ‘go for it,’ he would regret it for the rest of his life.

Let’s pause just for a moment to muse on how unbelievably stupid that really is…

Well, long story short, he took our ‘player’ friend’s advice and was now desperately struggling to save his broken and sinking marriage. Ironically, instead of being thankful he ‘went for it,’ he had now lost his children’s respect and was at the present time separated from his wife. Go figure.

Few would argue with me that sexual temptation is one of the most difficult things in this life to fight against. For my male-species friends, we all know that we are continually bombarded every day with all kinds of visual images that cater to our own sexual appetites. We live in a world awash with sexual temptation. We’re swimming around in it. And the tough thing is it all seems so inviting, so pleasurable, so satisfying…

And then we see the casualties on the other side of the bitten apple…

The broken people, the hurting marriages, the fractured relationships.
The folks we know who stepped across the line and are now paying a painful price.
Not like the Hollywood image at all, eh?

After a day or so of watching the media mercilessly dissect John Ensign, my wife Denise said something to me this morning over breakfast that made me nod in agreement,
“Except for the grace of God, there go I.”

article about the village in csm

Sat, 13 Jun 2009 11:11:48 -0700

http://www.csmonitor.com/2009/0604/p02s08-ussc.html

real community?

Thu, 11 Jun 2009 09:40:38 -0700

Have you ever wondered about this whole online community thing? You know, websites like Facebook, MySpace, Twitter, LinkedIn?

It is a convenient and easy way to keep track of friends, acquaintances, and sometimes people you’ve never met, like we all have a high need to do the latter. But to be honest with you, sometimes for me it feels a bit artificial. It doesn’t seem to scratch where I’m really itching.

Here’s one reason why. Ironically, in these virtual communities, we’re all called ‘friends.’ We request people to be our friend and visa versa. But honestly, are all these people really our friends? Some of these folks I barely know and in fact, may not even know at all. If I passed them on the street, we may not even recognize each other. I haven’t seen or talked to some of these people for years. I’m not sure if I saw them in the aisle at Target that we would even do more than say hello and move on to the toothpaste section. But they are my ‘friend’ on Facebook? How odd. What does being a friend in an online community like Facebook really mean? Are we redefining and digitizing the term? I’m hoping true friendship goes a bit deeper than that.

It is what Shane Hipps calls in his book, “Flickering Pixels” as ‘anonymous intimacy.’ He says it provides us with just enough connection to keep us from pursuing real intimacy. A place where vulnerability is optional. What I personally would call ‘closeness at arms length.’

It’s actually similar to what I spoke about last weekend at the Village celebration. It centers around what I said regarding spoiling our appetite for the really good things in life with other stuff. Is it possible when we only participate in an online community that we no longer have any hunger to be a part of an truly, authentic one? It would be a shame if the way we prefer to relate to one another is only through cyberspace.

I guess my argument is that there is just something to be said for the touchy, feely, physical realm with real people. I’m talkin’ the ‘live and in person’ kind. Actually being together with other living, breathing human beings in community, like sharing a meal in someone’s home or being truly present with others as the church. Shane Hipps’ argument is that there is a big difference from being ‘in touch’ vs. truly connecting with others. I would definitely agree.

So I guess what I am saying is that I would rather be your friend in person then in cyberspace any day of the week. It doesn’t matter to me that I notch up 500 friends on Facebook because the truth is most of them I don’t really know well or interact with at a very deep level. It’s like someone said to me one time in observing a person we both knew – “They have many acquaintances but very few real friends.” May that not be said about us in our own personal lives. Let’s never mistake the real and authentic for the virtual or digital. We all need REAL friends. True community is worth fighting for.

Grace.